User:Hawl/Abstinent Flu

08/2/2012 - Blog Of Healing - Third Entry

I’ve had a busy day…. it seems my gut feeling about two days ago was rather correct and only now am I able to talk about it. Hoo boy, where do I begin. First off… I have joined them and I’m kind of absorbing it all in. I haven’t really had time to adjust or really break in the new me. Let me start by stating the obvious. I feel… different.

I left my camera in the cab, so I can’t post pics like I promised, but let me get to describing my new self.

First off, the big question… how old am I. Well from what I gather I’m between 10 and 12. Though I’m one of the bustiest 11 year olds I’ve ever seen. I’m not packing D-Cups or anything like that, but for an eleven year old this is heavy and not in proportion to the rest of my frame. My skin took on a bit of a yellowish tone, I’m rather tanned though my hair is as white as snow. Not look long, but not too short either. Kind of disappointing. I was expecting to have crazy ridiculous hair. It’s longer than it was before (I had very short hair before) but I was expecting something outrageous but the only thing outrageous is my garb… I’ll explain later. To top it all off, my eyes are a very light blue. Odd my hair and eyes suggest an Ice Princess motif, but I’m too tan for that.

Let me clarify one thing before I move on to my tale. I have been asked “What’s my gender?” well, does that really matter? I’m a girl now if I wasn’t before, besides if the Black Van doesn’t stop we’re all going to be girls. The Black Van could gnab you while you’re out to check the mail or walking the dog. They don’t discriminate nor do they target anyone person in particular. The pattern is random and the sightings have been specific to all of North America Just recently it’s been happening in Canada and Mexico as well. Either the Black Van can teleport or there’s more than one of them. No one is safe, so all the men reading this I wouldn’t go bragging about your masculinity as much if you’re one of those macho men. Ladies don’t laugh, no one said you were immune to anything. If they can make a man into a little girl, surely they could do the reverse. Not that they have, just as far as we know it’s in the realm of possibilities.

One thing I will answer though is whether or not I have a job. Well no, no I don’t, I’ve been between jobs and doing some odd favors to make some cash to stay afloat, helping people move and cutting hair for neighborhood kids. That kind of thing. Which segways into what happened.

I was originally to start work at a Grocery Store, but get this. they bumped me off the schedule when corporate transferred two guys to the store I was going to start at. So that meant there were no hours for me and I was laid off before I could start! What a rip! So I dropped applications off everywhere.I could. Well… when I woke up after being abducted by the black van on my last look for it. It was to the ringing of my cellphone. Which now is pink, pretty, and has cats on it. It wasn’t before… yet all my contacts are here and the apps are the same. How strange… I had heard that sometimes your possessions were changed around by the Black Van but I discarded that as just gossip. Good thing I’m a loli now, I can separate the truth from the noise. So changing around of owned things. That’s truth.

Another is that we possess magic powers not unlike those in Sailor Moon or Dragon Ball Z. That’s a negative ghost rider, outside of being younger and much much cuter, I’m not that different. So that’s noise.

Where was I? Oh yeah that’s right! I was called by one of the places I put in for an application…. an Adult Toy & Lingerie Store called “Sinful Sodom.”

See when I started my quest for the Black Van I thought it would take months and instead it took a day. So I wasn’t thinking. See I still have my sex drive and my body does ache to be explored by curious hands, but I am not my body’s urges. I look like I should be starting middle school and my voice is adorably young. I gave it some thought, but, the squick factor of it all was too much for me. So I am abstinent until I re-age! I’ve heard about lolis who were less eager to wait, but I don’t want to talk about that. Luckily a lot of other lolis are on the same page, our body still feels the need, but if we try to act on it at all we start feeling ill until we stop. Likely a side-effect of the drug that changed us.

For any sickos who are curious, don’t be, we’re still physically children and thus anything too, touchy-feely with a Rejuvanette is illegal in all 50 states and for good reason… God.. this is already triggering it, I’m feeling nauseous. I have to change the subject. Not only because of the sickness, but I think just bringing it up has the feds watching this blog. There are other laws that affect us to. I’ll go over them right quick before I get back to Sinful Sodom.

The Child Labor laws don’t apply to us nor do the drinking age. It was thought that we were still competent and mature adults on the inside, thus we had a right to decide what we could do with our bodies. If we wanted to load them up with booze, we can. Provide we are at least twenty one chronologically. We can’t handle as much drinking, so a few of us have started root beer instead.

We however cannot drive cars, mostly because we’re so short it can be difficult for us and it makes enforcing underage driving laws harder to do as cops can’t tell a kid from a loli from a distance. There are however rights groups fighting hard to overturn the law. Though it’s only in a few states, North Carolina is one of them. Guess where I live! So no car for me, I have to take a cab.

Finally as for gun ownership…. Oh God, Gun Ownership… That’s such a wild barrel of monkeys that I dare not talk about it. Anyway, the laws are far enough for the most part, but there are still a few fucked up things. Like we have to take a lower minimum wage and work less hours because we’re “Just little girls.”, You know I may be eleven again but I have to keep the power on! They say the law will help us get jobs, but, having a job doesn’t mean shit if we have to work for peanuts. What’s worse is there are Child Protection Groups who want us classified legally as kids and have us adopted out to fitting parents. I am a grown ass pre-teen! A pre-teen yes, but still an adult. They claim we’re kids now and thus we need protecting. Yet every time the Government passes a law meant to protect our kind it just makes things worse for us!

We even have another group that want our rights restricted not to protect us, but to punish us for being “Imposter Kids” who coud “Hurt the real kids.”, oh of course. The TERFs (Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminists) weren’t bad enough, now we have that on us. Don’t think they get that this

You know it’s amazing how much one can care about the law when it applies to you. Heh sorry about the rant. I guess I thought being a Loli would be more magical than it was, I wasn’t thinking realistic about it. I have more self-confidence and I feel better than before, but, it’s not nirvana….

So getting back to Sinful Sodom, well. There’s not much to say. The lady took one look at me and groaned. “You should have mentioned on the resume that you were… a kid… Do you know what people would say if they saw a girl as young as you in here?”

But that wasn’t the worst part, no the worst part was the videos of softcore porn playing, the “massagers” they had on display, the lewd magazines. It was getting to me, I mean sure, it got me excited, but that was canceled out by flaring up my newfound allergy to… naughty things. I put my hands over my stomach and fell to the floor violently. I thought I was going to black out. I tried crawling to the lingerie section of the store away from the adult things, but it wasn’t working that well. The clerk run up to me trying to help me to my feet when I barfed all over her and a black leather and rather revealing nazi uniform, which they made me buy. Luckily it was in my size. I’m not sure WHY it was in my size, but it was. I haven’t been in that store since and right now I’m erasing all the “Purely Artistic Photos” off my computer so I don’t toss my cookies all over the keyboard.

Now the strange thing is, even though this outfit shows off my legs and even a little bit of my cleavage, yet it doesn’t trigger my sickness and actually feels really nice to wear. Well it did after I took off the swastikas and replaced them with drawings of flowers. This baffled me until I looked at some of my video games. Specifically those drawn by Nippon Ichi. In which there are a lot of younger female characters who dress in overly provactive attire. Special mention goes to Adell’s little sister from the second game, Hanoko. She can’t be older than four yet the girl is wearing nothing but tape over her nipples and a short pink mini-skirt. Yet in Team Ninja’s Dead Or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball there’s a character whose 16 despite looking to be in her early 20’s, and yet the game was controversial for many reasons. One of them that it featured an underage character in a sexual situation, even though she looked like an adult. To circumvent this Team Ninja retconned it with some bullshit about how no one knows her real age. Hell even when I look at myself in the mirror. I don’t think I look sexy, I think I look like I’m the villain from Akibaranger sans the purple hair.

So what I think is happening is the transformation is playing by the rules of Loli, acting sexy beyond moments when it’s funny or cute will make you feel sick. Yet you can dress as scantily clad as you want and nothing happens provided your nipples and ladybits are covered.

Interesting to note. I suspect as I get sickened by sexual situations my urges will vanish over time, hopefully to come back when I’m an adult again. Provided the rumor about us not aging isn’t true.

I’ve changed, quite a bit and it’s a lot for me to take in all it once. So I’m going to go take a nap, go for a walk, clear my head. It’s cool that I’m a Loli, I guess I overestimated how it would feel. I’m just, myself, but with somewhat higher self-esteem and well, my depression’s faded. I guess I’ve just gone from feeling down to being a little numb and feeling… fine.