Trials with God
Introduction
The purpose of this experiment is to discover or deny the existence of the being called "God". As with every scientific journal, it is important to begin with a hypothesis. I firmly believe that this being is simply a myth created by humans with the intent of giving themselves hope in living, and to enforce moral guidelines to the amoral.
This experiment will use seventeen kilograms of nitrogen, eight kilograms of uranium, sixteen grams of potassium, and fourteen milligrams of hydrogen. We believe that this combination under six hundred pounds of pressure will create a portal into the potential after life.
Day 1
Mark, John, and myself assembled the required materials. They have all been placed in the air compressor and are under constant surveillance. We will be adding a hundred pounds of pressure a day.
Day 4
The materials are now under four hundred pounds of pressure. Mark has been complaining lately about bad dreams related to this project. He has since requested to leave.
Day 6 The experiment is a total failure. The only result was a glob of radioactive mess. Mark left the project yesterday, and John has the day off tomorrow, so I will be the one to take care of the residue.
Day 7
It would appear that we were wrong. Upon clearing up the radioactive mess, I discovered a translucent sort of area underneath. Upon sticking my hand upon it, it disappeared into the portal, as if it went into another dimension. I will investigate more tomorrow when John returns.
Day 8
John called in sick today. I was too curious as to the implications of this portal so I took an old video camera and a rope to tether it to this side. The camera went in to the portal and the video produced was astonishing. Clouds were everywhere, as well as many men and women in white clothing. I truly believe I have discovered the afterlife.
Too excited in my discovery, I placed a sheet over the portal. I have no desire to let John take credit for this discovery and in turn win the nobel prize. I just hope he doesn't discover it tomorrow on my day off.
Day 9
I called John and told him I would be filling in for his shift. My curiosity is simply too great. I am going to tether myself to this world and go through the portal myself. There is no telling if a simply tether will be enough to bring my soul back to this world, but I have no choice. My curiosity is simply too great.
Day 10
God exists. I met him face to face. And he was none too happy about what I had been doing. The experiment was a total failure, as God himself opened the portal to meet with the mortals who thought they could defy his will. He tried to warn us through Mark, but we were too foolish to heed his warnings.
He cast a punishment on both myself and John from afar, saying that nobody will ever read my work, or believe our stories, and then sent me back.
Day 11
My work clothes felt a little loose this morning. This is a probable result of my stress and failure to eat yesterday and the day before. However, I seem to not be hungry.
When I tried to speak with John about the events of the past two days, I found my tongue to be tied. But overall, John seemed to be irrelevant in the course of events. Why have I even bothered to mention him thus far?
Day 12
John, at least I think that is his name, seemed to have lost all emotions. Nobody but myself pays him any heed at work, which seems strange as he used to be the life of the party. I can scarcely remember anything about him.
As for me, I seem to be shrinking. I usually have to bow my head in order to get under the door to the lab, but today I had no problem just walking through it. Upon measuring myself with a local tape measure, it would seem that I have somehow lost two inches of height. If not for my meeting with God, I would have tried to attribute this to bone density. What has God done with us
Day 13
A stranger managed to walk in past the guards today and into the laboratory I work in. I don't know who he thinks he is, but I seemed to not want to pay him any heed. After lunch, he was simply gone. I don't even know why I'm writing about him, he simply seems unimportant.
My boss told me to take a day off as I was looking very sick to him. Upon looking at the mirror, I notice that my usual olive skin had turned into a sickly grey color. I don't feel sick, but I have no idea what this curse of God is doing to me. I agreed and told him that I would call back tomorrow if I didn't feel any better.
Day 14
Any hope I had that this was simply an illness and not a curse of God vanished today. I have shrunk from my previous height of 6 foot 4 into a new height of 5 foot 6. There is no scientific explanation even possible for shrinking 10 inches in a matter of 3 days.
I have also seemed to be losing weight in many areas, such as my face, my waist, and my arms. As much as I wish this was all fat, I realize that much of what I am losing is muscle mass. My previous tree trunk arms now look almost dainty.
Day 15
My bed this morning was absolutely disgusting! It seemed like last night while I slept, all the hair on my body seemed to have dislodged. I look like a real sight to see in the mirror without a hair on my body.
My skin has completely changed. I am now as pale as the moon, and the roots of my hair now appear to be blonde instead of black. I can no longer describe myself as African-American, but now have to say I look almost like a Scandinavian. I think I am also developing freckles. I still do not understand what the purpose of this change is and how it punishes me other than changing my features. Actually, didn't God say he was going to punish someone else? I can't remember who though.
Day 16
It would seem my changes have stopped. I have measure four foot eleven the past two days, ninety pounds, and my skin and hair look to be unchanged. Well, other than the fact that my hair now has two inches of blonde at the roots instead of just a tip.
I spent my day studying scientific journals to attempt to catch up in the world of biology, but for some reason the journals seemed to be much more difficult to read. Normally fascinated by such articles of the behavior of the african penguin, I found myself almost falling asleep.
Day 17
Dear Journal,
My voice has been cracking all day. It is like I am going through puberty again. I can almost feel the hormones rushing through me, and I think I even got a zit! No, not a zit, a case of acne would be the better way of writing it. The scientific community would shun me if they read such a teenage word in a scientific article. If they ever read it.
As I write this, I realize that I have not had an erection in the past three days. Upon observation, my penis does seem to have shrunk a little bit.
Day 18
Dear Journal,
To my horror, my penis seems to be receding. I think it's a waste of time to measure it, I mean, just look at it! My testicles seem to also be moving upwards into my body.
Day 19
Dear Journal,
Pain has enveloped my body. This is truly the punishment God has designed for me. I can feel my organs shift inside of me. My penis in a painful pop entered into my body, leaving only a cavernous hole. My testicles have obviously rearranged themselves as ovaries. Tingles are occurring all over my chest area, and I realize what is about to happen.
Day 20
Dear Journal,
The change completed itself overnight. I walked over to the mirror and had a look at myself. Shoulder length blonde hair, relatively small but perky breasts, and a nice hourglass figure. I looked almost like a sixteen year old Swede.
But God has been merciful. I did not wake up in my own room, but instead in a room with middle age parents I have never met. They insisted on calling me "Kristen" so I will go with that name for the rest of my life. My room is completely pink from the bed linens to the walls to the little doilies on my dresser. I have a large wardrobe filled with casual wear and school uniforms. I have no idea why this journal was still around on my nightstand but I have to keep it safe. It is the only proof I have of the whole ordeal.
Then again, who would believe in the journal of a sixteen year old girl? Reading back, who is John? And what in the world is Potassium? Isn't that a vitamin to take in the morning?
Day 21
Dear Journal,
So today at school, I met a boy named Luke! Oh my God, he was like so dreamy! His eyes seem to sparkle and he had this perfectly toned body. He smiled at me and told me "The bell is about to ring, Kristen, you better hurry up." It was like I met my dream man sent to me from the heavens!
I suppose this shift would have been harder if I had been a straight man, but I suppose as a gay man it was a little bit easier. It is amazing though how easy it is to adapt as a female. Girls I know always complained about four things - high heels, periods, childbirth, and breasts. I attempted to walk around in high heels today and while it certainly did hurt my calves, I got used to them very quickly. Breasts haven't been much of an issue. While I have them, they are only A cups (which I somehow just knew even though I had never shopped for a bra). They still hurt if I run, like in gym today, but they aren't attention grabbing.
Speaking of which, guys, my eyes are up here!
Day 22
Dear Diary,
Luke today said I looked even more marvelous than ever! Oh god, I want to date him now. He's just... oh my God! So like, I totally hate biology class. That teacher is such a pain! She keeps yelling at me for falling asleep in her class. She keeps talking about these antelope and cattle and crap, and I just don't care! Maybe before I was interested, but as Kristen, I just don't care.
Day 23
Dear Diary,
Today I entered into my biology class and the teacher looked at me funny. "Are you sure you're not in the wrong class?" she had asked. Indigently I took my seat, but I got called down to the principal's office. He told me about a complaint from my freshman biology teacher and how I didn't show up to her class. But when I asked him what he was talking about, and how I was in Junior year biology, he laughed at me and showed my name. Since when was I a Freshman?
Luke isn't even looking at me anymore. He says I am too young for his tastes. But I'm a Junior, the same grade as he is! That guy needs to learn a bit about his own life!
April 24th
Dear Diary,
This morning I woke up to find that all my wardrobe had changed! I no longer had the preppy outfits and uniforms of a high school student, but instead what seemed to be the wardrobe of a rebellious seventh grader.
I experienced my first cramp this morning. I guess God didn't spare me that agony. When I talked to my mom about it, I realized that this apparently is my first period ever. She gave me some Tylenol to calm me down, and showed me how to wear a pad. I have obviously shrunk a little bit as I have to reach for items I didn't need to before.
It would also seem that my already small breasts are beginning to shrink, and my hips are becoming a little less shapely.
April 25th
Dear Diary,
So today at Westboro Elementary Mrs. Staples introduced a new friend to us! Her name is Mary and she is just sooooo cute! I am so jealous! Maybe I'll get lucky when I hit puberty and I can rival her one day! Today we learned all about things like the greatest common factor practiced writing short paragraphs. You know how every day for an hour we go to the other 5th grade class and do science? Well, Mrs. Nare told me that I really would have to work hard if I wanted to succeed. I can't help it! Science just isn't my strong point!
Today is Friday, but me and the girls are all going to be having a sleepover this weekend! Doesn't that sound fun? I probably won't be able to write in you until Monday, but tah tah for now!
April 28
Dear Diry,
We lerned cusive today. It is so hard! I dont want to lern it. Why do 2nd graders need to know cusive? For homework we have to write twenty spellig sentances. I dont want to do that many! And they all have to be in cusive. I hat mrs frish! She is a meanie poopy head.
Love,
Kristen
Ten Years Later
My age regression stopped at age 8, when I was in second grade. I cannot remember any of the events recorded here, but I am very certain that I did not know words like "Potassium" and "Radioactive" when I was 8. These entries are all definitely in my handwriting, so I believe that the events recorded are true - I used to be a male scientist, but was cursed by God and both turned into a girl and regressed in age to the ripe age of 8, where for most people is the true start of their life. Nobody really remembers events that happen before that age, outside of a fragmented memory or two.
While God has punished me according to this journal, of which I cannot recall any events of, he has certainly been merciful. I was placed in a loving family, and was not made particularly ugly or pretty. The earlier accounts of me are accurate. I am short, Scandinavian, have small breasts, and have been gifted the ability to eat all I want and not gain weight. While my grades are not straight A's, they were good enough to get me into the University of Michigan, where I will be studying my real passion - music. I happen to have been gifted, by God, the ability to play flute exceptionally well. I truly hope this will serve as a warning to all. Do not challenge God, as you will most certainly lose.