User:Slyfordtrabbit/Eternal Glory

{{#ifeq: User |User| Eternal Glory | Eternal Glory}}[[Title::{{#ifeq: User |User| Eternal Glory | Eternal Glory}}| ]]
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   {{#ifeq: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}} | || 
     Author: [[User:{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}|{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}]] [[Author::{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}| ]]
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   {{#ifeq: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}} | |
     Author: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyford T. Rabbit | Slyford T. Rabbit}} |
     Author: [[User:{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}|{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyford T. Rabbit | Slyford T. Rabbit}}]] [[Author::{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyford T. Rabbit | Slyford T. Rabbit}}| ]]
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   {{#ifeq: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}} | | Authors: ' | 
     Authors: [[User:{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}|{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}]] 
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   {{#ifeq: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}} | |
     Authors: {{#ifeq: User |User| Slyford T. Rabbit | Slyford T. Rabbit}} |
     Author: [[User:{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyfordtrabbit | Slyfordtrabbit}}|{{#ifeq: User |User| Slyford T. Rabbit | Slyford T. Rabbit}}]] 
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(For those who never trusted those silly Care Bear things)

A stalk of corn snapped under my weight as I stumbled into the field. Everything looked as if it were covered in black mesh; my sight was blurring from the fatigue of running for my life. From hiding place to hiding place I went, bolting to cover whenever I heard their soft, giggly laugh filling the air.

They had my friends. Each and every one of my closest buddies changed right in front of me, lit only by the hellish rainbow that stole their free will. With a horrible wretch in my gut I watched as their bodies rounded, limbs shortened, skin grew soft and fuzzy, and screeched when the emblem burned right into their soul…

My only hope was out here, I knew that for certain. Out in this wide-open harvested cornfield. Either take the chance or live forever like Them. Neo Care.

Out in the field I pawed at the dirt, hoping against all odds that my hand would touch the cold metal I was looking for. My breath came in scattered gasps, each one shallow with the effort of staying quiet. If I could only stay out of sight for a few minutes, search at least half the cornfield for my prized possession…

The sound of giggling in the background made my spine go limp and my pants moisten. They were coming. In the distance I heard their war cry – distorted, miserable, yet astonishingly warm and cute – and shivered through and through. My hands idly searched for the cold steel, yet my mind could not pull itself away from the constant mantra cutting the air.

"Care! Care!" they screamed, their fuzzy white stomachs shining brightly with the light of a thousand television sets. In their sparkly eyes I saw nothing but emptiness, a mere shell of the friends and family they had once been. Their rainbows, pot'o'golds, horseshoes, hearts, and bright bulbs had taken that form them long ago, and left the mark on their belly.

Without thinking twice I curled up into a little ball, watching my life pass before my eyes. They were going to take my soul away. They were going to make me care. They were going to turn me into something I was never meant to be!

My life passed before my eyes, laced with interference from their cutesy mind-control powers. Teddy bears danced at my grandpa's funeral. A cloud car raced in front of my first Sunbird. And all the while I felt my mental image changing – no, withering – into a twisted sort of happy freak, someone who was always willing to help, who never cared about himself more than his friends.

Their ranks surrounded me, I noticed out of the corners of my hidden eyes, they had me in a twisted sort of group hug! I felt a warm fuzzy surrounding my heart, slowly burning away at the very fabric of my existence, mutilating it into something that was capable of caring and sharing and giving all the love in its heart.

Some twisted angel pulled my head up, and my vision filled with a vision of pure, goodhearted, lovable evil. There he was, Neo Bear himself. Dressed in all black, chest emblem sporting a cute rendition of an iMac. In his eyes I saw something worse than emptiness, worse than the shriveled souls of my forever lost family and friends: domination.

Then, like a bolt of lightning slamming into my body, the black bear screamed the three words I had ran from for so long: "Care Bears, stare!" A screech escaped my throat as the rainbow-colored light surrounded me. Stalks poked into my body as I writhed in the freshly-cut field, but the physical pain meant next-to-nothing.

My mind was burning!

A white-hot fire had erupted in my cerebellum, burning thoughts of violence and honor, exhausting love and caring. Looking down I could see the beginnings of a four-leaf clover etching itself into my new fuzzy pot-belly My mind slowly gave in to the flame, feeding it dreams, desires, will…

…until my head bumped into a long piece of cold steel. Cold, and loaded.

All my willpower latched onto my right arm; it was the only real thing left in my universe, along with the long piece of steel only inches away. The last shreds of my mind screamed out in agony, knowing that six inches separated me from freedom and eternal care. I had to reach it!

Inch by inch, stalk by stalk I reached for the cold steel, swimming through prismatic light thicker than concrete. Each tiny twitch of my fingers felt as if it would be my last. Cute green fur was quickly climbing up what remained of my arm, a reminder of how close I was to death, trying to convince me that I had lost.

But when my fingers touched the stock, I knew I had things under control. The feeling of something real in my hands fought against the Stare attack, giving me the sense to stand up and point to the leader. The black bear looked at me with the most hateful eyes, eyes filled with a thousand names and a thousand grudges, combined with a thousand reasons to care for every last one of them.

"You…" I started, "you… you…" nothing would come. I fought and fought against the stare, but nothing would come! Sickness clanged at my stomach, turning into butterflies as seconds ticked by. I felt happy! Happy and loved!

"You are a very special Care Bear, Neo" I said in a rickety voice, "I want to care for you forever!" My larynx gargled on the words, clearing itself out with a giggle. A cute, loveable giggle.

My fingers did the talking for me. One pull on the trigger and the black bear fell to the ground, strawberry jelly and pink flowers spewing all over the place. The prismatic Stare stopped immediately, as the empty souls took a step back.

"Why?" One asked, "Why do you have to be mean to others? He just wanted to help you----"

"Stuff it!" I commanded, swinging the sawed-off shotgun to face the purple raccoon's cute little face, "Or I'll show you what it's like to care." The residual effects of the Stare were starting to wear off; my thoughts had come back, the fur on my chest receded, and the shamrock vanished into thin air.

"We just want to help you!" They screamed in chorus, "Just let us care! You can care with us! Care… Care…" Slowly they stepped even closer, rubbing their soft paws into the gaps of my shredded jeans. It felt as if flowers were growing where they had touched. Fur started to explode forth, and my legs softened to a cuter state. It felt so good, in fact, that I nearly sat down and let the little green bear come back out of me…

"No!" I screamed, knocking one bear off his rocker with the butt of my shotgun. He had been my drinking buddy at one time, I suddenly remembered. With the gun I pointed to another random bear and crouched down. "Take three steps away and don't try anything funny." While they stepped I felt around for the three shells I knew would be laying around the gun. If I could just line them up, four shells might be enough to free them…

The sound of a cloud car puttering through the sky kept me from saving my friends, though. Without thinking twice I took off as fast as the new legs would carry me, off to a new hiding place. The Calvary had arrived, and I wasn't going to stick around to welcome them.