Difference between revisions of "User talk:Kenani/The Girl of His Dreams"

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::A) Thanks for the praise and advice. When you say I should focus more on the story, might you by any chance be able to be more specific?
 
::A) Thanks for the praise and advice. When you say I should focus more on the story, might you by any chance be able to be more specific?
::B) I went ahead and read [[The Tail Tale]]. It seems like the main idea is "focus more on what happens after TF and how it affects the main character's life." Would I be correct in thinking this? (Although, a lot of it seems to pertain to anthro TF, and that's just not something I'm interested in.)
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::B) I went ahead and read [[The Tail Tale]]. It seems like the main idea is "focus more on what happens after TF and how it affects the main character's life." Would I be correct in thinking this? (Although, a lot of it seems to pertain to anthro TF, and that's just not something I'm interested in.) --[[User:Kenani|Kenani]] 01:34, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
--[[User:Kenani|Kenani]] 01:34, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
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Revision as of 20:37, 29 June 2009

My first story on Shifti. Enjoy.--Kenani 19:12, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

A little formulaic, but well-written. Nicely done. —Robotech Master 19:15, 29 June 2009 (UTC)
Not bad. As RM said, a bit formulaic, but well executed. Pardon me while I go add you to the Pack. -- ShadowWolf 19:22, 29 June 2009 (UTC)
Thanks, then. It may be formulaic, but keep in mind that it's my first story. Gotta start somewhere. --Kenani 19:28, 29 June 2009 (UTC)
That is why you earned a spot in the Pack down in the Promising New Authors section - as you noticed (and corrected the link - thanks) -- ShadowWolf 19:45, 29 June 2009 (UTC)
Yep. You might want to go check out the Writer's School, and in particular The Tail Tale. There's some good advice for new writers in the School. —Robotech Master 20:32, 29 June 2009 (UTC)
Hey, I go to that school! Really, it is very useful. Welcome to the pack, though I'm not officially in it yet, and have a good stay on shifti. I look forward to whatever else escapes from your brain onto the page. --Concerned Reader 00:27, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
Hmm...not a bad story, pretty good, in fact. But of course you've already heard that. But there are some things not too good about it (no offense). For example, this appears to be just a setup for the TF to happen: the introduction and ending are both a little hasty. It would be nicer if you could elaborate more on the story itself and less on the TF. Everyone's seen a dog TF before, but it's your storyline that's sets your story apart from the rest. It is the way you write the story that makes it special. So, what I'd suggest for your next story is concentrating less on the actual change and more on the story, the plot, the characters.
Oh, and congrats on getting the place in the Pack! ShadowWolf's a really great guy, and an excellent critic: I think you should pester him for a critique just like I did (don't tell him that I'm telling you: he'll kill me). This story deserved to get in. Write more soon! And yes, Writers' School is really useful. I go there a lot. :) --Drake, 08:27, 30 June 2009 (+0800 GMT)
A) Thanks for the praise and advice. When you say I should focus more on the story, might you by any chance be able to be more specific?
B) I went ahead and read The Tail Tale. It seems like the main idea is "focus more on what happens after TF and how it affects the main character's life." Would I be correct in thinking this? (Although, a lot of it seems to pertain to anthro TF, and that's just not something I'm interested in.) --Kenani 01:34, 30 June 2009 (UTC)