Difference between revisions of "Delivery Guy"

Revision as of 16:18, 1 February 2011

Well Doc, it all started last weekend. Frank and I, we were delivering snacks and soda pop to the Convention Center and loading the machines there, when piff!. Well, it wasn't really a sound, more like a pressure, like when you're in a plane or going over the mountains. Well piff! it went and Frank was gone. Instead, there was this big, busty woman in Frank's clothes, or something like Frank's clothes, because they fit her you see. And she was all over me in an instant, saying how she'd alway wanted me, and how I should call her Francine. Scared the ever-loving bejeezus out of me. Now, don't mistake me, she was hot and all, but she had been Frank about fifteen seconds before. And that was just wrong. I lit out of there pretty quick.

If I thought it was any better away from the snack room, I thought wrong. Things were even more peculiar. People were rushing about in a panic, running into things, knocking one another over. And not all the people were quite people, if you know what I mean. Then there were the animals and alien things too. They all had the same notion I did, to get the Hell away from there. None of us were standing on ceremony either. It was Devil take the hindmost. And I'm pretty sure I saw at least one Devil there too.

It took a while, and it was dangerous, but I finally made it to the truck. I saw neither Frank nor Francine, so I just drove back for the warehouse. It took some convincing to get past the cordon the police set up, but they had their hands full and I looked normal, so they let me through. I was done for the day. There was no way I was taking any more routes, especially by my self. When I got back, the other employees were all sitting around the TV we have in the office, watching CNN.

They found it amazing that I hadn't got caught by whatever was going on at the Convention Center and had me tell them what had happened there more than once. They didn't blame me too much for leaving Frank behind, under the circumstances. We all figured he'd show up some time or other as one sex or the other. Rita was rather looking forward to not being the only woman working at the Snack Kingdom Warehouse.

Most of us decided it must have been terrorists, who or how they did it being a deep mystery. Rita said she thought it was just that when weird folk get together to do weird shit, weird shit happens. I tended to agree with her. After that we watched CNN again for a while. It was mostly footage shot from a helicopter of the Convention Center smoking slightly, with a tantalizing glimpse of animals and strange-looking people wandering about the lawn. This was followed by the anchor talking to a panel of experts that seemed to blame the Administration for what was happening. Then there was some more footage of emergency vehicles arriving and leaving the grounds. Which was in turn followed by the anchor questioning another damn panel of experts that seemed to think it was the previous Administration's fault. Now, how could they possibly claim to have any experts on what happened that weekend?

I was only able to take about a half-hour of that. I got up and told everyone that I was going home. They all agreed I'd had a rough day and should get some rest. Rita suggested that I should pop over the the emergency room and get checked out. I declined, hospitals always gave me the willies anyway and the thoughts of what might be going on there now made me queesy. I told them I didn't want to take-up space needed for those in far worse shape than me.

I was glad to get out of there and into my car. I was feeling uneasy, positively antsy, and it got worse the longer I watched those images on the TV. I flipped on the radio, but every station had stuff about the Convention Center. I finally gave it up and put on a tape. I stopped to get some food, then drove on home.

I tried to watch TV while I ate but again it was all about the Center on every channel and was mostly the same footage and mostly the same panels. I was feeling pretty bad by then, with a dull headache and a feverish feeling. Eventually I just gave up and went to bed. The rest that happened you can see for yourself. I went right to the emergency room directly I got up this morning.

What did I eat that evening? Why what I eat just about every evening, chicken. Yes I do like chicken quite a bit. My Granny said I'd tear into a plate of fried chicken like a fox tore into a hen...house...damn.

So you think Doc that's where the ears, bushy tail and teeth came from? Well, could of been worse. I could of ended up with feathers and a beak.

 "Physician's Commentary" 

Dr. Sands

I find this case (7739) very troubling. This represents at least one, and perhaps two cases where the Xanadu effect (XE) changed an individual who was not at the time wearing a costume (see also case 147b-Robert for another possible instance). In this instance there was also an approximate 12-18 hour delay in the onset of changes. This indicates that perhaps the XE does not follow set rules as we've been assuming.

The second subject, Franklin (aka Francine) Nesbit, has not yet been located for an interview. I need not tell you what the implications are there (unless Nesbit was wearing a hidden female undergarmet of course). Locating her for interview is of the highest priority.

Archibald Cummings, MD

 "THE END"