User:Hawl/As A Woman I RIDE(DC) - Revision history

Hawl at 21:22, 14 February 2019

2019-02-14T21:22:49Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:22, 14 February 2019
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	On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, fucking all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?		On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, fucking all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?

	Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!		Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms.

	This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail that come with that. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese ~~Cartoon~~. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.		This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail that come with that. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Anime. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.

	How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in all the worlds. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my close-minded Mother would do.		How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in all the worlds. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my close-minded Mother would do.

Hawl at 11:26, 31 May 2018

2018-05-31T11:26:06Z

Hawl at 11:19, 31 May 2018

2018-05-31T11:19:23Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 06:19, 31 May 2018
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	I got up and went to the bathroom, wondering why the cliche of dreaming about your “true self” never seemed to apply to me. My real body, the one I deserve, is denied to me even in my dreams. Instead, they're either about Earth or about falling. Moving onto the the mirror I saw what I usually see, that reflection, HIS reflection. That masculine face of mine. My face is kind of cute in a way, but it’s not me and it never will be. I slammed my fist on the sink in rage as I grabbed my toothbrush. Hurting my hand in the process! Just a bruise, but the rage was getting very hard to contain, it's been getting a lot harder these past few days and I'm about to reach my bursting point.		I got up and went to the bathroom, wondering why the cliche of dreaming about your “true self” never seemed to apply to me. My real body, the one I deserve, is denied to me even in my dreams. Instead, they're either about Earth or about falling. Moving onto the the mirror I saw what I usually see, that reflection, HIS reflection. That masculine face of mine. My face is kind of cute in a way, but it’s not me and it never will be. I slammed my fist on the sink in rage as I grabbed my toothbrush. Hurting my hand in the process! Just a bruise, but the rage was getting very hard to contain, it's been getting a lot harder these past few days and I'm about to reach my bursting point.

	In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. ~~Had~~ a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.		In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. On my fair face I had a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.

	After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, twas my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day. As far as gaming goes I don't really tackle things much more complicated than Solitaire or the odd visual novel. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom being a fashion designer made most of the decorating decisions and her tastes in my humble opinion were a little on the tacky side.		After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, twas my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day. As far as gaming goes I don't really tackle things much more complicated than Solitaire or the odd visual novel. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom being a fashion designer made most of the decorating decisions and her tastes in my humble opinion were a little on the tacky side.
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	“I was your age once Paul. It’s only natural for a young man in his 20’s to want a little escapism every once in awhile. Especially one who works for someone like Mr. Bertrand, I bet you hear a lot of crazy stories from him.” She said with an expectant look, as if she wanted to hear one. Though I knew if I really told her one she’d probably get uncomfortable. Simon's stories tend to be really out there.		“I was your age once Paul. It’s only natural for a young man in his 20’s to want a little escapism every once in awhile. Especially one who works for someone like Mr. Bertrand, I bet you hear a lot of crazy stories from him.” She said with an expectant look, as if she wanted to hear one. Though I knew if I really told her one she’d probably get uncomfortable. Simon's stories tend to be really out there.

	“I uh... don’t have anything springing to mind at the moment... I’m hoping I’ll get to work on a desert rescue one day.” I half-lied, though I’ve always wanted to ask someone about the Integrates, someone who wouldn’t be scared to tell me or just insisted they didn’t exist. I guess it’s going to take someone rich, famous, and with a really big mouth to integrate for the denial to stop. It’s kind of silly, even an Earther like me knows they’re out there. I hear from ~~two~~ many people who have friends ~~dissapear with~~ their RIDEs with no warning, the ~~two~~ just started getting a little too close and then, they're gone.		“I uh... don’t have anything springing to mind at the moment... I’m hoping I’ll get to work on a desert rescue one day.” I half-lied, though I’ve always wanted to ask someone about the Integrates, someone who wouldn’t be scared to tell me or just insisted they didn’t exist. I guess it’s going to take someone rich, famous, and with a really big mouth to integrate for the denial to stop. It’s kind of silly, even an Earther like me knows they’re out there. I hear from too many people who have friends and their RIDEs go missing with no warning, same story each time the human and RIDE just started getting a little too close and then, they're gone.

	“There are strange things out in the desert, most of them dangerous things. I wouldn’t dwell on them son.” she said as she adjusted her glasses and gave me a look of concern.		“There are strange things out in the desert, most of them dangerous things. I wouldn’t dwell on them son.” she said as she adjusted her glasses and gave me a look of concern.

Hawl: saving progress

2018-05-21T01:21:12Z

saving progress

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:21, 20 May 2018
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	“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.		“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.

	“Had a nice dream?” she asked me in her usual chipper tone as she took a sip from her mug of coffee. ~~Or as~~ was ~~usual~~ when she wasn’t complaining about the weird things on Zharus and how much they change people. The unusual things on Earth didn't strike her the right way either, mother always loathed Virtual Life and discouraged anyone from using it, she never minded if you did use it as long as you weren't a Reverbek. Mom could say what she will though, she could not deny Dad and I felt a lot calmer about this planet than what passes for Earth, but she’s always had a few things that irk her about this place.		“Had a nice dream?” she asked me in her usual chipper tone as she took a sip from her mug of coffee. Mom was happy when she wasn’t complaining about the weird things on Zharus and how much they change people. The unusual things on Earth didn't strike her the right way either, mother always loathed Virtual Life and discouraged anyone from using it, she never minded if you did use it as long as you weren't a Reverbek. Mom could say what she will though, she could not deny Dad and I felt a lot calmer about this planet than what passes for Earth, but she’s always had a few things that irk her about this place. The Virtual stuff on Zharus didn't bug Mom as much though since no one took it to the same extremes they did on Earth.

	“Eh nothing special, but I was trying to.” I replied back. Truthfully I was, I downloaded a book on Lucid Dreaming and was trying to dream myself into a woman. That sweet relief, can I have it for just a second? Just long enough to take a breathe and know that I’m a good girl. A beautiful curvaceous lass. Just, for a second? Outside of Virtual I mean.		“Eh nothing special, but I was trying to.” I replied back. Truthfully I was, I downloaded a book on Lucid Dreaming and was trying to dream myself into a woman. That sweet relief, can I have it for just a second? Just long enough to take a breathe and know that I’m a good girl. A beautiful curvaceous lass. Just, for a second? Outside of Virtual I mean. I hear it's so real in those lucid dreams, no simulation can even come close.

	“Practicing Lucid Dreaming again? Can’t you just fiddle with VR like a normal kid your age?” she asked, adding just a dash of sarcasm to the latter bit~~. Not too much, it was only Virtual LIFE she had a problem with~~.		“Practicing Lucid Dreaming again? Can’t you just fiddle with VR like a normal kid your age?” she asked, adding just a dash of sarcasm to the latter bit.

	“Yeah, but....” I didn’t really have an answer for that. I have thought about it, it sounded like tons of fun on the internet. Even a child’s game could net you a female body image. The problem is, that I knew it wasn’t real. The fact that I couldn’t take my clothes off or touch myself with too much feeling was enough to ruin it. An online pen pal who used to be in the same boat till she crossed says it seems to work fine if you stay focused. Especially if you did so in more, adult, chatrooms. Sounds like fun admittedly.. To tease horny boys.. but I... I don’t know if it’s for me.. It’s a little risque and I don’t know I have that in me. In a lucid dream, my conscious mind controls all!		“Yeah, but....” I didn’t really have an answer for that. I have thought about it, it sounded like tons of fun on the internet. Even a child’s game could net you a female body image. The problem is, that I knew it wasn’t real. The fact that I couldn’t take my clothes off or touch myself with too much feeling was enough to ruin it. An online pen pal who used to be in the same boat till she crossed says it seems to work fine if you stay focused and try to let your mind work with the technology. Especially if you did so in more, adult, chatrooms. Sounds like fun admittedly.. To tease horny boys.. but I... I don’t know if it’s for me.. It’s a little risque and I don’t know I have that in me. In a lucid dream, my conscious mind controls all!

	Everything is purely me, but VR, where I can use avatars to stabilize the image. I can easily tell how fake it is, it just has that vibe to it. You know? It’s like wearing a costume on Halloween. Even it it’s a good one, you know it’s fake. I hear it’s different if you’ve managed to be completely separated from your body, but my hardware isn’t good enough for that. If I had a RIDE and became completely submerged in its programming that would be another story all together, but if I had a RIDE, chances are I’d already be female. There are implants that force you to lucidly dream, but they only really did the “Brain Boosts” and “Prosthetic Body” thing on Earth, ~~here’s all about~~ RIDEs~~. I’ve read there are some programs~~, but~~, well.~~. ~~Part of me wants to earn it on my own.... Some~~ people ~~say they can’t tell the difference between VR~~ and ~~RL, maybe I’m just stubborn~~, but ~~I sure as hell can. Some people also say~~ that I'~~m just making excuses, well, nuts to them!~~		Everything is purely me, but VR, where I can use avatars to stabilize the image. I can easily tell how fake it is, it just has that vibe to it. You know? It’s like wearing a costume on Halloween. Even it it’s a good one, you know it’s fake. I hear it’s different if you’ve managed to be completely separated from your body, but my hardware isn’t good enough for that. If I had a RIDE and became completely submerged in its programming that would be another story all together, but if I had a RIDE, chances are I’d already be female. There are some implants that force you to lucidly dream, but they only really did the “Brain Boosts” and “Prosthetic Body” thing on Earth. If you want to go Transhuman on Earth, you need a RIDE. I've heard rumors of transhuman enthusiasts bonding with their RIDEs permanently in a method called Integration, but I've never known anyone who actually did that. Many people claim Integrates don't exist and it's all an urban legend, but a wise man once told me that there's no smoke without fire.

	“You want something less artificial?” she asked, giving me an approving smile, almost like she was somehow appraising me.		“You want something less artificial?” she asked, giving me an approving smile, almost like she was somehow appraising me.

Hawl at 00:33, 21 May 2018

2018-05-21T00:33:41Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:33, 20 May 2018
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	Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!		Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!

	This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail ~~in it for you too~~. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.		This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail that come with that. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.

	How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in all the worlds. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my close-minded Mother would do.		How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in all the worlds. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my close-minded Mother would do.
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	In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. Had a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.		In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. Had a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.

	After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, ~~was~~ my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day, I don't really tackle things much more complicated than Solitaire or the odd visual novel. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom being a fashion designer made most of the decorating decisions and her tastes in my humble opinion were a little on the tacky side.		After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, twas my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day. As far as gaming goes I don't really tackle things much more complicated than Solitaire or the odd visual novel. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom being a fashion designer made most of the decorating decisions and her tastes in my humble opinion were a little on the tacky side.

	My name’s Paul by the way. Paul Devon Reverbek. My father was cooking outside on the grill, I could see him through the screen door. Dad usually cooked, my mother did not really know how to. Admittedly for the best, my dad’s food was probably the very best thing about being his son. I was a bit of a late sleeper when I didn’t have work, so by now it was the afternoon, no exactly noon. I still can’t get used to Zharusian time, 30 hours in a day and I am still wired for 24. Dad would be fixing lunch right about now. The discarded packaging in the trash told me it was his trademark buffalo burgers, and not the fabbed kind either. Natural buffalo meat is much easier to come by on Zharus, you can get pretty much anything here and if you can not find something there is always at least one person in any given place who would be happy to show you where it is.		My name’s Paul by the way. Paul Devon Reverbek. My father was cooking outside on the grill, I could see him through the screen door. Dad usually cooked, my mother did not really know how to. Admittedly for the best, my dad’s food was probably the very best thing about being his son. I was a bit of a late sleeper when I didn’t have work, so by now it was the afternoon, no exactly noon. I still can’t get used to Zharusian time, 30 hours in a day and I am still wired for 24. Dad would be fixing lunch right about now. The discarded packaging in the trash told me it was his trademark buffalo burgers, and not the fabbed kind either. Natural buffalo meat is much easier to come by on Zharus, you can get pretty much anything here and if you can not find something there is always at least one person in any given place who would be happy to show you where it is.

	“Hey there sleepy head, how’s my little man?” She said. Mom was wearing her usual glasses, they had a computer in them for work and also they helped her see, ~~she wore them mostly for the second thing I said~~. Lo and behold she was also wearing that velvet outfit, the one that mixed the colors blue and purple, it was a strange and abstract gown that she sometimes liked wearing. I always thought it was silly, but she seemed to like it, for whatever reason.		“Hey there sleepy head, how’s my little man?” She said. Mom was wearing her usual glasses, they had a computer in them for work and also they helped her see,. Lo and behold she was also wearing that velvet outfit, the one that mixed the colors blue and purple, it was a strange and abstract gown that she sometimes liked wearing. I always thought it was silly, but she seemed to like it, for whatever reason. Well Mom's outfit wasn't too horrible it did have that weird made of stone look to it that I'm not sure how to describe.

	“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.		“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.

Hawl: saving progress

2018-05-20T21:07:40Z

saving progress

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:07, 20 May 2018
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	June 4th, 148 AL		June 4th, 148 AL

	On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, ~~boning~~ all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?		On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, fucking all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?

	Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!		Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!
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	This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail in it for you too. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.		This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail in it for you too. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.

	How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in the ~~galaxy~~. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my Mother would do		How could my dad ever face me if I was female? The bond between a man and his son is one of the most sacred things in all the worlds. That bond has been so for several families for countless generations. As far back as recorded human history goes a dad and his son were two of the closest family members in the house, second only to husband and wife. So, how could he ever possibly accept me as his daughter? Dad’s just one man, and yet his reaction alone could destroy me and my future. It was a nightmare to envision, me standing there in the clothes that fit only my body, looking downward in shame for myself, as my father did the same. Wondering just where he went wrong with his beloved “son”. It would crush his spirit and make him regret we ever came to Zharus, Planet Of Cross-Riding Freaks! And that's not getting into what my close-minded Mother would do.

	I got up and went to the bathroom, wondering why the cliche of dreaming about your “true self” never seemed to apply to me. My real body, the one I deserve, is denied to me even in my dreams. Instead, they're either about Earth or ~~they're~~ about falling. Moving onto the the mirror I saw what I usually see, that reflection, HIS reflection. That masculine face of mine. My face is kind of cute in a way, but it’s not me and it never will be. I slammed my fist on the sink in rage as I grabbed me my ~~tooth~~. Hurting my hand in the process! Just a bruise, but the rage was getting very hard to contain, it's been getting a lot harder these past few days and I'm about to reach my bursting point.		I got up and went to the bathroom, wondering why the cliche of dreaming about your “true self” never seemed to apply to me. My real body, the one I deserve, is denied to me even in my dreams. Instead, they're either about Earth or about falling. Moving onto the the mirror I saw what I usually see, that reflection, HIS reflection. That masculine face of mine. My face is kind of cute in a way, but it’s not me and it never will be. I slammed my fist on the sink in rage as I grabbed my toothbrush. Hurting my hand in the process! Just a bruise, but the rage was getting very hard to contain, it's been getting a lot harder these past few days and I'm about to reach my bursting point.

	In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. Had a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.		In my reflection I could see that I had brown hair, blue eyes, and a fair face. Had a bit of a goatee, itchy sometimes, but it was another guilty pleasure. I could not take pleasure in being a man, Christ knows I tried, but I could try to enjoy having some pretty nice facial hair.

	After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, was my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day, ~~personally~~ I ~~don’t care for gaming of any sort, except for~~ the ~~very casual stuff~~. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom made most of the decorating decisions and her ~~taste~~ in ~~fashion was~~ a little on the tacky side.		After brushing my teeth and getting dressed, in jeans and a green shirt from an old video game, was my dad’s, he was very into twenty first century gaming back in his day, I don't really tackle things much more complicated than Solitaire or the odd visual novel. I forgot who this guy on my shirt was. Looked like some kind of lumberjack or a plumber, he had an L on his hat. Larry? Lenny? Louie? That last one felt right. I went downstairs to meet with the rest of the Reverbek Clan. Our stairs were red and velvety looking, my mom being a fashion designer made most of the decorating decisions and her tastes in my humble opinion were a little on the tacky side.

	My name’s Paul by the way. Paul Devon Reverbek. My father was cooking outside on the grill, I could see him through the screen door. Dad usually cooked, my mother did not really know how to. Admittedly for the best, my dad’s food was probably the very best thing about being his son. I was a bit of a late sleeper when I didn’t have work, so by now it was the afternoon, no exactly noon. I still can’t get used to Zharusian time, 30 hours in a day and I'm still wired for 24. Dad would be fixing lunch right about now. The discarded packaging in the trash told me it was his trademark buffalo burgers. Natural buffalo meat is ~~not easy~~ to come by on Zharus~~. I have~~ always ~~wondered~~ where ~~exactly the buffalo he liked cooking up just outside our yellow kitchen slash dining room actually came from. I asked a few times, but always he said that~~ it ~~was his little secret. I need to remember to ask mom one of these days, she’s more straightforward than my sometimes nonsensical father~~.		My name’s Paul by the way. Paul Devon Reverbek. My father was cooking outside on the grill, I could see him through the screen door. Dad usually cooked, my mother did not really know how to. Admittedly for the best, my dad’s food was probably the very best thing about being his son. I was a bit of a late sleeper when I didn’t have work, so by now it was the afternoon, no exactly noon. I still can’t get used to Zharusian time, 30 hours in a day and I am still wired for 24. Dad would be fixing lunch right about now. The discarded packaging in the trash told me it was his trademark buffalo burgers, and not the fabbed kind either. Natural buffalo meat is much easier to come by on Zharus, you can get pretty much anything here and if you can not find something there is always at least one person in any given place who would be happy to show you where it is.

	~~Speak of the devil, she’s talking to me.~~ “Hey there sleepy head, how’s my little man?” She said. Mom was wearing her usual glasses, they had a computer in them for work and also they helped her see, she wore them mostly for the second thing I said. Lo and behold she was also wearing that velvet outfit, the one that mixed the colors blue and purple, it was a strange and abstract gown that she sometimes liked wearing. I always thought it was ~~tacky~~, but she seemed to like it, for whatever reason.		“Hey there sleepy head, how’s my little man?” She said. Mom was wearing her usual glasses, they had a computer in them for work and also they helped her see, she wore them mostly for the second thing I said. Lo and behold she was also wearing that velvet outfit, the one that mixed the colors blue and purple, it was a strange and abstract gown that she sometimes liked wearing. I always thought it was silly, but she seemed to like it, for whatever reason.

	“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.		“I did not really want to get up.” I said to her with a shrug, I really didn’t, nothing matters when you’re asleep. The world could be on fire, but as long as you’re catching some z’s that does not matter at all.

Hawl: a start... I guess

2018-05-10T01:43:28Z

a start... I guess

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:43, 9 May 2018
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	On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, boning all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?		On the planet of Zharus, one of many colonies in Earth-Space, there was a happy family with a happy son. Well of course he was happy, who wouldn’t be happy being the son? The one who carries the family name towards future generations, takes charge, becomes a man, and stands tall on behalf of all who came before him. The man marries a woman and comforts her and sees her through the bad. It has always been the destiny of a man to help a woman through her insecurities. The man has the responsibility of telling her everything will be okay tomorrow because he’s going to make sure of it. Men are called to slay dragons and love every minute of it. We men do it because god damn testosterone drives us to just love masculine things like fighting, partying, boning all the chicks they can because that is manly and not being manly makes you a pussy. Sounds fun right? Right?

	Oh God why did I have to be born this way? ~~Why must I keep this charade up~~? ~~Who did I offend in a past life? Or is the great creator~~, ~~whoever he or she is, just an asshole!?!? I mean they’ve gotta be omnipotent right? So~~ why ~~would they~~ give me a body ~~like this~~ if ~~all~~ it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this ~~damned~~ thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!		Oh God why did I have to be born this way? Please you're all powerful and all knowing? So tell me, why give me this body if it can bring me are tears? My body is supposed to command strength! Take leadership roles! Live everyday using reason and power! Instead all it can do is make me regret every second this darned thing has a pulse. Freedom or Death, whatever comes first I will welcome it with open arms!

	This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail in it for you too. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.		This is all what I meant when I woke up and groaned, one outward breath that said everything. I didn’t have a look at my body first, I’m in it, I can feel how wrong it is for me just fine. This was my curse and I had to live with it. Oh sure, there was was always getting filled up with nanites. If that ever happens they'd change my body around to whatever I wanted and then they would work hard to maintain it and make it permanent! Sounds nice right? Well, it’s pricey and I’m broke. I could probably try the other way to get your gender bent, there are some super powers and a tail in it for you too. Yes a tail, ears too, just like a cat girl in an old Japanese Cartoon. I could have that done so easily and Tokyo Mew Mew has always been a guilty pleasure I’ve been partial to. So why didn't I just take it? My friend Simon could just snap his fingers and it would be so. Well I guess the real problem is what it has been for male females like me since the Oil Ages. My family.

Hawl: The Director's Cut version of As A Woman I RIDE, under construction

2018-05-08T17:17:50Z

The Director's Cut version of As A Woman I RIDE, under construction

Show changes

← Older revision		Revision as of 06:26, 31 May 2018
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	“There are strange things out in the desert, most of them dangerous things. I wouldn’t dwell on them son.” she said as she adjusted her glasses and gave me a look of concern.		“There are strange things out in the desert, most of them dangerous things. I wouldn’t dwell on them son.” she said as she adjusted her glasses and gave me a look of concern.

	Dad turned around from the grill, his antlers in full view, I had no idea how he walked with those things on his head. My mouth was watering as I noticed him carrying a large smoking plate of burgers, all done up nicely, almost everything on them. Normally he liked to load these things up, but he didn’t appear to have made any chilli to go along with it. We must have been out. Good Chilli, not the Fab Stuff, we do not touch fab chilli in this house. As dad says “A Fabber is an insult that is not worthy to touch real meat. It’s alright, if you like ramen.” personally I like Fab Shrimp, and how it does seafood in general.		Dad turned around from the grill, his antlers in full view, I had no idea how he walked with those things on his head. My mouth was watering as I noticed him carrying a large smoking plate of burgers, all done up nicely, almost everything on them. Normally he liked to load these things up, but he didn’t appear to have made any chilli to go along with it. We must have been out. Good Chilli, again not the Fab Stuff, we do not touch fab chilli in this house. As dad says “A Fabber is an insult that is not worthy to touch real meat. It’s alright, if you like ramen.” personally I like Fab Shrimp, and how it does seafood in general.

	Father plopped the plate down in the middle of our circular table and smiled at me. “I was worried I’d have to drag you in here. You can sleep through breakfast, but I’m not letting you sleep through buffalo.” After a few fuses with our pet buck he wasn’t too much into meat, but he still ~~made buffalo for the rest of us~~. I waited for Mom to get hers, it was obvious which two were deer ol’ dad’s, but I was lactose intolerant and unable to tell which cheese was which. The no fabbed stuff on real stuff rule is bent for me to put non-milk cheese on my burger. My parents both ate cheese made with real milk which ~~was actually kind~~ of ~~easy to find here unlike most places in Zharus~~. I live in Venars, which is a farming community, not ~~too~~ too many Riders as a result, no real reason for them out here.		Father plopped the plate down in the middle of our circular table and smiled at me. “I was worried I’d have to drag you in here. You can sleep through breakfast, but I’m not letting you sleep through buffalo.” After a few fuses with our pet buck he wasn’t too much into meat, but he still loved his grill. I waited for Mom to get hers, it was obvious which two were deer ol’ dad’s, but I was lactose intolerant and unable to tell which cheese was which. The no fabbed stuff on real stuff rule is bent for me to put non-milk cheese on my burger. My parents both ate cheese made with real milk which we had a large supply of. I live in Venars, which is a farming community, not too many of the older folks were Riders as a result, no real reason for them out here. There are still enough enthusiasts and tourists to keep Simon's La Wrench De Paris open.

	By now you’ve really noticed why the family is a dilemma for fixing this accursed male body of mine, they’re the best parents anyone could ask for. I could never do something as cruel or as heartless as take their only son away from them and force them to come up with these same feelings for their daughter.		By now you’ve really noticed why the family is a dilemma for fixing this accursed male body of mine, they’re the best parents anyone could ask for. I could never do something as cruel or as heartless as take their only son away from them and force them to come up with these same feelings for their daughter.

	When it became clear which buffalo burgers were mine I descended upon them like a vulture on a dead rabbit. Dad smiled at my carnivorous habit, “That’s my boy!” he spoke forward “A Predator like I was back on Earth! I bet you’ll get yourself a nice jaguar RIDE!”. He still had an appreciation for meat ~~and grilling~~ despite losing his taste for actually eating it.		When it became clear which buffalo burgers were mine I descended upon them like a vulture on a dead rabbit. Dad smiled at my carnivorous habit, “That’s my boy!” he spoke forward “A Predator like I was back on Earth! I bet you’ll get yourself a nice jaguar RIDE!”. He still had an appreciation for meat despite losing his taste for actually eating it.

	“Alexander!” My mother exclaimed looking panicked at me, and then furiously at my father. “Don’t encourage him!”		“Alexander!” My mother exclaimed looking panicked at me, and then furiously at my father. “Don’t encourage him!”
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	“What, boys his age are all getting RIDEs, and honestly they’re not that bad, we should look into getting you one.” He said, with a smile on his face, looking his wife with curiosity in his eyes. Likely wondering how the woman who birthed me would look with doe ears.		“What, boys his age are all getting RIDEs, and honestly they’re not that bad, we should look into getting you one.” He said, with a smile on his face, looking his wife with curiosity in his eyes. Likely wondering how the woman who birthed me would look with doe ears.

	Mom scoured at him “You’re not even the same person anymore! The Alexander I married didn’t eat Trashfu!! Who knows what those beasts would do to me..” She was afraid of RIDEs ~~and what they did to people~~. More so what they did to people, like I said she was very against Virtual Life and people who tried to bodymod themselves to look like thier Virtual Life characters. As for the RI half of the RIDEs she was actually very nice to them. Mom loved Claude and treated him like the dog we used to have back home, sadly he did not survive the trip to Zharus and we had to have an Airlock Funeral for him aboard the Silverstar.		Mom scoured at him “You’re not even the same person anymore! The Alexander I married didn’t eat Trashfu!! Who knows what those beasts would do to me..” She was afraid not of RIDEs but of Fuser Nanos, any major changes in general creeped her out. More so what they did to people, like I said she was very against Virtual Life and people who tried to bodymod themselves to look like thier Virtual Life characters. As for the RI half of the RIDEs she was actually very nice to them. Mom loved Claude and treated him like the dog we used to have back home, sadly he did not survive the trip to Zharus and we had to have an Airlock Funeral for him aboard the Silverstar.

	Dad laughed “I still love grilling don’t I? I’m still your deer ol’ husband!” he said giving his goofiest possible smile. One that looked like he was trying his hardest not to laugh.		Dad laughed “I still love grilling don’t I? I’m still your deer ol’ husband!” he said giving his goofiest possible smile. One that looked like he was trying his hardest not to laugh.
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	“No offense sport, but Claude is a male, don’t want to take any risks. So I’ll stick with someone who has at least been with a RIDE before.” He said to me, in fear of the price-tag of RIDEs that won’t leave me with two mothers more so than any concern for Claude. Sometimes I wondered if he knew his beloved buck was actually alive. I was a little offended, but after looking upward at his antlers, I thought maybe it was a good idea to have Simon fix the deer half of the duo that is my father.		“No offense sport, but Claude is a male, don’t want to take any risks. So I’ll stick with someone who has at least been with a RIDE before.” He said to me, in fear of the price-tag of RIDEs that won’t leave me with two mothers more so than any concern for Claude. Sometimes I wondered if he knew his beloved buck was actually alive. I was a little offended, but after looking upward at his antlers, I thought maybe it was a good idea to have Simon fix the deer half of the duo that is my father.

	“Sounds like a minor enough problem, but maybe you want to ask him about the whole nanite thing next time you see him. It’s only been a few months and you already have ~~antlers~~.” I warned, sometimes faulty nanites or over exposure can have some mutating effects, some people liked it and broke their nanites on purpose to become anthropomorphic animals.		“Sounds like a minor enough problem, but maybe you want to ask him about the whole nanite thing next time you see him. It’s only been a few months and you already have heavy duty headgear.” I warned, sometimes faulty nanites or over exposure can have some mutating effects, some people liked it and broke their nanites on purpose to become anthropomorphic animals.

	“Oh? Pretty sure it’s normal to have animal bits.” He said, mom looked like she nearly choked on her food!		“Oh? Pretty sure it’s normal to have animal bits.” He said, mom looked like she nearly choked on her food!